Written in December 2025
This is part 2 of my tips list for a neurodivergent-friendly Christmas, whatever your age. There’s so much crossover in the traits and support needs of autistic people and ADHDers that it’s worth reading both lists, you’ll find something on each that applies to you or your family.
- Understand that we might become totally hyperfixated on a particular present and ignore all others (and people) while we engage with it. That’s our hyperfocus mode engaging and it’s a pretty nice place for our brains to be
- We might fare better with presents exchanged in stages or over a couple of days so we don’t get too overwhelmed with all the new things at once
- Give us notice of transitions between activities, such as opening presents and eating lunch, or food and then going for a walk, or solo time and then family time. Visual counters (sand timers, egg timers) are great for ADHDers especially.
- Understand that we might get overstimulated, and need some quiet time to unwind. Although ADHDers tend to like activity and bustle, we can become overstimulated without realising it. We might appreciate a reminder, or a gentle shift in vibe to give us that space
- Let us use our fidgets and stim toys throughout the day – they help us focus, keep calm, and pay attention through games like charades or Monopoly (just kidding, don’t force an ADHD person to play the same game for 6 hours!)
- Multi-tasking can be a massive challenge, so offer to help us with tasks related to the cooking, washing up and all that jazz, if the ADHDer in your life is responsible for feeding everyone. If you want to eat, help out! (wait, wasn’t that a Sunak initiative?!)
- If we’ve forgotten to buy someone a present, or send someone a card, it wasn’t a personal slight against that person, we struggle with remembering people we know and yes, we feel terrible when this happens but we can’t help it.
- We might also forget where we’ve hidden presents. In the run up to the day, you can help us by making a note of where we’ve put things. This will make your life a lot easier when we ask you for help finding the gift stash.
- ADHD shutdowns can happen when events are over, especially ones that have taken up a significant amount of our brainpower for the past several weeks. We may become withdrawn, quiet, emotional or incapacitated in the days after the Big Day. We need support, time, and understanding. Help us out by taking some of the demands off our plates.